jokes are funny, but some people shut down their humor

i've always found it funny that many people don't consider why we do the things we do. they don't wonder why we breathe oxygen, or drink water, or have our senses concentrated in or around our heads (a process called cephalization); it's enough for them that we simply do.

to wit: why do we laugh? what is the reason for laughter? i don't think we really know, definitively, but one theory i like is that laughter is the human response to the perception of incongruity. this means people laugh when they expect a thing or situation to be or turn out one way, but then it turns out a different way. this probably developed from a collective defense mechanism. that is, the ancestors of men, living in arboreal or swamp-like environments, would become tense when they saw ripples in the water or a shivering of leaves; after all, those could be signs there was a predator ready to spring forth. in short, their minds started anticipating one particular outcome of events. when the rustling stopped to reveal only the wind acting on the leaves, or the goldfish jumped up from the water, these (simian?) creatures saw an outcome different from the one they anticipated. to show that there was no immediate threat to the group/family/clan/tribe, the ones closest to the source of 'danger' started laughing, which eventually everyone shared in when they realized there was no danger. this could also be the reason why laughter is 'infectious'.

i don't mean to give you something you could more succinctly or detailedly learn by cruising wikipedia. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laughter i mean to say that laughter is itself a human outlet for tension. so i fail to comprehend the easy offence some people take at humor.

story: i'm at a bar in itaewon this saturday, talking with fellow rugby players of my friend paul. so i meet this one lass, introduce myself and start talking to her. i'm not attracted to her (i don't think she's much attractive at all) and i was not trying to pick her up, only talk to her, in my inebriated-enough state. she says some boys embarrassed her friend a couple of weekends back. they accomplished this by getting her drunk on fair quantities of liquor, and convinced her, while she was not of sound mind, to take off her top and dance on tables. so, in a jocular voice, and nothing approaching serious reflection, she asks 'how can i get back at them?'

now i, equally jocular, proffer the suggestion that she cruise their facebook pages, learn the names of their mothers, their hometowns, and send an email, official-enough looking, from a 'hospital' in their hometowns, staffed by a 'doctor' with an uncommon but not rare name offering his condolescences for his mother's recent diagnosis of cancer. of course, this was jocularly suggested, and had it been actually followed through, it WOULD have been funny given the incredible dedication and attention to detail it would require.

at this point, the girl, who shall remain nameless, but you know who you are, lays into me, lambasting me for my lack of 'sensitivity'. it turns out her mom died from cancer. i kindly apologized to her, and reminded her that no one had a monopoly on suffering. i don't really feel i had anything to apologize for, but i didn't wanna ruin the lass's night. you see she'd forgotten that just because cancer deaths lost humor in her situation, they did NOT lose humor in all situations. in fact, there's really no reason cancer deaths SHOULD have lost humor in her situation, except that she let them.

i hope i always remember humor is a tool to relieve tension, and that i receive jokes in the same spirit in which it's given.

cold weather and the gods must be crazy

the weather for the past two or so weeks in incheon has been awesome (for what is in essence mid-winter). the temperature has not really gone down below 3 degrees, even at night, and i've been wearing a light jacket. but starting tomorrow the forecast has at least three days of maximum 0. that's right, maximum 0. I'm gonna have to break out my big jacket again, and wear the under armour longjohns, cause i can't take temperatures that cold. i'm hoping, hoping, hoping the climate augurs have it wrong (again) this time.

i also finished the gods must be crazy, an excellent (if a bit dated) film about a glass coke bottle mindlessly dropped from a low-flying passenger plane into a remote region of the kalahari which is then found by a wandering bushmen. the film follows the bottle's attendant degradation of the moral atmosphere of the bushmen camp and its leaders voyage to 'the end of the world' to dispose of it. the film is generally light-hearted and optimistic, and gives a great insight into the simplicity, warmth, openness, and even innocence of 'uncivilized' man.

cultural gaps and meldings

there was a significant amount of shit that went down after i moved out of my apartment and into my new one. first off was the fact that the cleaning job i did was evidently not up to snuff with what management felt it should be. they said they had to throw out the comforter since there was too much dog hair on it. now i'm bearing in mind that i washed the comforter, and when i moved into the apt. i didn't get a new comforter. who knows how many people had sex or threw up their sick in it before i moved in there. i took it as a given that it was washed and i slept in it satisfied. i'll take my licks for not cleaning it up to their snuff, but i don't wanna be told that having a dog is somehow dirtier than jizzing all over the comforter.

jake and brian got into a state because there's no a/c in jake's new place, and it's promised in his contract. essentially jake's gonna have to stand firm to get what he's due. i think it'll happen.

on a more promising note, i went with heidi to see the potential stud for margo. the guy has two males. the older one is evidently pretty popular in korea, he's been in a few commercials and has been studded out over 30 times. he's solid and friendly, i just worry about the soreness on his nose and his glossy eye. they keep him outside and bull terriers have skin issues, so they should really keep him indoors. the picture is of the owner and the stud, whose name is actually 'bull'. they've got a really good looking but somewhat smaller male out there as well, and i might end up putting her with him.

솔날 and brenda's parents' house

about a week ago headed to brenda's parents' farmhouse for the 솔날 holiday. they live in a small town outside of 안동 (andong).

before going i thought i'd be totally uncomfortable, since brenda's the only one who speaks english in her family. but it turns out that i wasn't uncomfortable at all, and i think brenda was overjoyed that i put in some facetime with her folks. not to mention that she, her mother and her father all cooked some real good food out there. i ate well those two days.

jake came in and he's getting along nicely, as he seems to everywhere. we're gonna pay someone to teach us korean lessons. my goal is to be able to translate between my family and brenda's when my folks come out for the wedding.

jake's already making good waves with the other foreigners in 만수동 and he's being his usual brusk but somehow still easily relatable self. The above is his 'goaded-into-it but still-happily-obliging' pose with our buddy Simon who had passed out in the arms of lady liquor previously. strangely (or not so) i wasn't asked to strike one with 'sick boy'. i'm too sullen and surly for spontaneous pictures, and of course, not near enough photogenic.